Archive | December 2016

Three Things to do When Life Isn’t Fair

Hello, Dear One.ccaad6587380d0998db4a1a593c2282f

I don’t know what happened, but I know at some point, perhaps out of love, you made yourself beautifully vulnerable. You opened your heart to possibilities, and something exquisite happened to you during that time. But then – something else happened that shook you to your core. A betrayal, perhaps. Maybe you trusted someone who hurt you. Maybe you got so busy taking care of wayward travelers that you forgot to watch where you own feet landed. Maybe winter crept in when you thought you still had more time. Maybe everything to which you had grown attached was taken away from you.

So here you are. Uncertain how to cope with this broken spirit. You have stopped listening to your inner guide. You have grown weary and afraid. You have locked your heart up tightly to protect your vulnerability. The nightfall no longer shelters your dreams, but instead your fears. And you are looking for a way out.

Come on over by the fire and grab a blanket. Let me offer you some comfort. Sometimes it just helps to hear a friend say “Yes, I know. Me too.”

Life isn’t fair. Here are some thoughts that help me deal. Maybe they will help you too.

  1. Goddesses don’t react – they respond. Because there are always possibilities. You always have a choice. Reaction is instinctual. Response is a choice. Often we react quickly and without thinking because we feel threatened, or because we feel that we have been left without options. Next time something seems unfair, try to pause for a moment before your emotions get the best of you (I know, easier said than done). Put your situation in context. Instead of saying “I can’t . . .” rephrase your sentence to “How can I . . .?” Options. Possibilities. They are always there. I promise.

  2. Goddesses own it – bad luck and all. Recognize that this isn’t necessarily happening TO you in a singled-out-by-the-Universe sort of way – it’s just happening. We often resort to blame-shifting when things don’t go our way. We blame circumstances, our upbringing, even our loved ones. But if you step back and witness life with honest eyes, you might see that this unfairness isn’t a cruel joke at your expense played by the cosmos, but more likely just an unlucky situation that could happen to anyone. In which case, acceptance of your circumstances becomes much easier. And once you’ve accepted it, you will be equipped with the personal power to put things in context and make whatever necessary changes are required to take ownership of your life.

  1. Ask yourself, “what is being called forth in me?” Ohhhhhhh, this is a tough one, dearest. But often what seems unfair is the catalyst to our personal growth. You must reach into your depths – to your deepest reserves – and realize that no one is coming to save you. You must save yourself. Rid yourself of entitlement and co-dependence. Remind yourself that you are powerful beyond measure. Goddesses know that when they are frightened or uncomfortable, it is a sign they are growing. These times, more than ever, are moments of truth. You can either rise like the phoenix that you are, or go down in flames. Your choice. But you and I both know what you are capable of.


Within you are all of these. Be brave, my love. I believe in you.

Big bear hugs,



Ten Things I Wish I Could Tell My Younger Self


  1. There is no beginning too small. Don’t get overwhelmed. Do the simple things first. Keep moving.

  2. If it isn’t fun, do something different.

  3. Don’t aim for balance. Aim for harmony.

  4. Be happy where you are. Acceptance, not resistance. Always.

  5. See what you believe. Perspective is everything.

  6. Prayer is talking. Meditation is listening.

  7. Challenge your beliefs (when they no longer fit the person you have become).

  8. Celebrate everything.

  9. Go ahead. Walk away. Just because someone shares your home or your DNA or has just been part of your life forever doesn’t mean they are good for you. Remember what you deserve.

  10. Play for one hour every day.